There it was in my inbox : an email from my hubby with a list of the audiologists in the area who are in our healthcare network.
You see, I’ve been asking questions like these for some time now: “What’s that?” “What did you say?” “Pardon?” *raises eyebrows* “Can you repeat that?” And I do mean that I ask these questions many times a day, especially of my kids. And it isn’t because I’m not paying attention. No, I’m intent. But, I’ve thought for a while now that my hearing may be slipping away.
However, every time I’d mention it to Michael in the past, he’d brush the suggestion off and tell me not to be so concerned over it… until now.
This email on the screen was like a flashing neon sign. (which is a good thing, since I might not have heard a buzzer or alarm.)
Up until this point my family has been so patient, repeating two and three times what they’re trying to say to me. But, sending me this email was like confirmation: He agrees with me. He thinks I’m loosing my hearing, too. Or possibly he’s finally tired of repeating 5 million times a day.
I feel a bit like Beethoven and not in a glamorous, famous composer kind of way. I mean, I’m a musician – I can’t loose my hearing, can I? I guess this may be payback for all those hours in a tiny practice room…
At any rate, I’ve been praying in a bit of a desperate fashion that this will all be sorted out easily,- and it got me to thinking… Why am I not worried about hearing God’s voice? I mean, if my physical hearing is so important to me – what about my spiritual hearing?
Daily, I move through life – in silence, not hearing the things my Heavenly Father is saying to me…Oh how my heart would be changed, how my behavior would change, if I would listen more carefully for His gentle voice.
But, I heard him this morning. Kindly, patiently He began speaking all of the promises my forgetful heart needed to hear:
that He is for me. that He forgives me. that He is with me, and I don’t have to fear anything. that He has a plan. that He is in control. that His way is best. that He is still at work, and He’s not gonna give up on me. that He is my friend. that He is good, in all circumstances. that He loves me unconditionally. and that these promises are gifts – not one of them I can work hard enough to earn.
With these thoughts, I’m reminded to make two appointments. The first one with Him, recurring daily on my calendar, to take quiet moments and hear His voice. And the second one with a doctor on the list in Michael’s email – maybe I’ll only need one of those appointments!
Thank you, Heavenly Father for being faithful to your Word and to your Promises! And that You are willing to speak them loudly to me, when I don’t hear the first or second or hundredth time! amen.
daily portion 