the fragrance of freedom

You may have heard that the Days have a pool pass this summer.  Okay, probably not.  But, we’ve been living the high life, enjoying the season’s heat from the cool waters of the Signal Mountain Pool.  I have always loved swimming.  In fact, I really love summer.  I find the perfume of the chlorinated water, mixing with the scent of Copper Tone to be an intoxicating combination.

So, when Michael and I considered purchasing a pass I was elated.  And at the same time, the idea gave me a moments pause.

“Why?” you ask.  Well, I’ll tell you.

The truth is going to the pool could have some complications.   What if I don’t know anyone there?  What if I’m wearing the wrong swimsuit? What if I look terrible in the right swimsuit? What if my kids aren’t as good at swimming as the others?  What if they whisper when we walk by, knowing that we aren’t from “the mountain”?  What if, what if, what if….Those are all the questions that began to bombard me for consideration…

I wanted the essence of the pool, without the struggle…  I wanted to enjoy our summer in the sunshine, with healthy tan-lines, and the aroma of sunscreen on our towels – without all the junk that I’m prone to worry over.  But how?    It was as though  I needed to learn a few lessons all over again, but with the help of a few click-ish mothers.

Doesn’t everyone at some point in life feel the desire to be accepted? to fit in?   It could just be me…

With great resolve, I decided to purchase the pass and enjoy the pool with my children, to focus on them and our time together.  After all, this was for them, not really for me – and the fun that we were going to share was far important than if someone was staring because our lunch cooler wasn’t “hip”.

And I found the Holy Spirit, reminding me of something which changed my perspective : You are my child.  I made you in my image.  What others think does not matter because my love for you gives you freedom:  the freedom to be who I created.  Freedom to be you.  Don’t be tied down by others opinions or attitudes.  You are loved.  You are free.

from John 8:
³² And you will know the truth, and the truth will set you free.”

Well, we’ve been to the pool a bunch of times.  And my focus has been on my children.  I haven’t worried about the other moms at the pool.  I haven’t noticed if my suit isn’t the right one.  And my children have loved every second of it.  I’ve even heard from my oldest, “This is the best summer ever, Mom!”

Today could have been a different story for me, though.  Sitting on the side of the baby pool, watching Mackenzie splash after her water toys, I was greeted by another mom, “Oh, hello Melody!”  she said, “How was your drive up the mountain today?”  and all the moms turned towards me with their eyes looking me over, as if to say, “Who is this that comes up here to swim, but doesn’t live on “the mountain”?”

and I smiled.  Because for the first time in my life, I was free from their thoughts.  I wasn’t at the pool for them.

As we dried off and got ready to leave the pool for the afternoon, I took a full breath.  With the smell of chlorine and the sunscreen hanging around our shoulders , there was a new scent mingling.  I inhaled deeply.  It was the fragrance of freedom.