A day to slow down and enjoy…  a gracious gift to our family.

A few Saturdays back Michael was preparing to work outside in the shop.  He told Isaac to put his coat on and come out back with him.  I happened to be sitting nearby as Isaac was getting his shoes on and as I watched him, he stopped.  He had a funny look on his face, and he said, “Wait Daddy, wait!  I’m coming!  Just a minute!”  He ran to his room and came back a moment later.

He had his little tiny set of tools in his hand.  “I got my tools Daddy!  I’m ready!” he shouted out the back door in Michael’s direction.

Pride was bursting from his seams, standing there holding the “just-his-size” tools.  It made me grin, and I said, “Well, go on and get out there, Daddy needs your help.”  And he bopped on down the back steps towards the workshop.

Now, I knew, and so did Michael that those tools were nowhere near big enough to handle the work they would be doing inside the shop that day.  But, still the opportunity was there for him to see how to use larger versions of his own tools.

Of course, it made me think about another tool our family uses.  We’ve been learning Scripture here at home.  Simple verses.  Verses that provide help for Isaac and our other children in their young lives.  Verses that we can use now.  But the beauty of it is,  as they see us apply these same verses too, eventually they will know how to apply them more thoroughly and deeply to their own hearts.

Oh! the beauty of these words to a young child, scared of the dark at bedtime:  “So do not fear for I am with you, do not be afraid for I am your God…”  But it becomes all the more comforting, a thoroughly peaceful promise in grown up dark places, in the shadow of death, or in other unexpected valleys of pain and suffering.

If I dwell here too long, I’m convicted.  Often, in the middle of the worst trials, my example is to pick up everything but the beautiful words of Life He has given to us.  But to show my sweet children the right way to use God’s Word I know I must pick it up more.   Read it.  Love it.  Believe it.    And when I do, I’m showing them His Word is my Joy.

I am grateful for the gift of Scripture and how by the power of the Holy Spirit it can meet every need, at every age.  I love teaching it to our children as they grow, giving them  Scripture that is meaningful to them even now,  and watching the Holy Spirit move in their young hearts.  But those same Scriptures they will use again and again, as their lives become bigger and fill with challenges, and Jesus will become more real to them.

Thank you Heavenly Father for this beautiful gift you have given to us, Your Words, thorough and complete – comforting, encouraging, invigorating and powerful.  I am blessed by your providence that provides for every need of our hearts.  Provide strength and wisdom to let me show my own children that Your Words truly are my Joy.   amen.

A few days ago, I sat on my bed early in the morning, sipping my tea and watching the news.  All of a sudden my room was a bright pink hue.  I grabbed my camera and ran for the back porch.  The sky was on fire with colors I could not have imagined if I tried.

I managed to get a few snaps before the moment passed, but my camera could not do the scene justice.

The memory of it all was burned in my heart – His glory, His promises emblazoned across the sky.   Later that day, when most of Chattanooga was chatting about the beauty of it all, I couldn’t help but believe His handiwork was for me…

My Unbreaking – Promise Maker and Friend had painted the sky… with his promises of love, protection, fresh mercies every morning.  He has made so many promises to His children, I can’t really comprehend them all. But, those three were the ones I thought of as I stared at His glorious fingerprints across the morning.

Well, here I sit on the hotel bed, in Nashville considering my morning appointment tomorrow at Vanderbilt.  The last 6 months have brought whirling emotions.  I’ve been unsure of the turns in my road;  the possible surprises that could pop up in this chapter of my story are hard to contemplate.

And I’m prepared to tell you in all honesty that His promises are what I’m dwelling on this evening.  It isn’t a convenient way for them to be brought to mind.  I mean, really. Lymphoma? Isn’t there a better way, a simpler way, for His love and promises to be brought to mind and understood?

The truth?  No, I don’t think so.

In the midst of this journey He has been everything He ever promised He would be.  I would have never met Him this way, in all of His love and affection for me, and His mercy extended to me, without the struggle.

So tonight, I will sleep well, dreaming of that glorious sky, that bold reminder of His goodness, and believe that His promises are for me.

Oh Beautiful Winter, how I love you!  

You know, under all that fluffy, white snow is dead grass.  Beneath all of the cold, not much can thrive. This is a time of hibernation and many living things are in deep sleep.  

and yet, there is a true beauty.

As I look on, a lady- in-waiting, I know there is new life coming.  He has promised it is so.

There are times I find my heart mid-winter.  It would be a bleak winter if I didn’t know His truth.  There are seasons when the old needs to die, so that something new can be birthed. Often death must happen for that something new to fully bloom in my heart.  

I find refreshment, here, in this wintry place of peace and quiet – because I believe His promise of spring.

So, it came down to this:  He thought we would leave him alone.

That was the reason for all of Isaac’s wailing and tears and crying and coming out of his room over and over again, even when the clock said it was way passed his bed time.    My Isaac, my sweet, sweet boy would not be consoled.  Not by my hugs and kisses, or my words…  nothing. worked.

Just that afternoon he’d been swinging at his Grandmama’s without a care in the world.  And now?  Fears terrorized his heart without a way of stopping, it seemed.

It was late at this point.  very late.  We were planning to leave at 4 in the morning to head north to Nanny and Papa’s house.  But there was no rest for this weary, worry-worn little boy.  And no sleep for any of us.

I held him in my lap on the floor of his room, my arms around him tight, and I said, “Isaac I would never load up the car and go away and leave you here.  Never.  I promise.”  And he nodded, but his whole body shook, quite terrified.  “But what if I don’t hear you call when it is time to go?  What if I stay asleep?”  I promised him over and over, that it wouldn’t work out that way.  That I love him too much to leave him alone.

But it can be hard to believe the truth when you’re in the full swing of fear…

As I pulled him close a little longer, trying to steady his furiously pounding heart, I realized that there were stretches of 2013,  when I was pushed to and fro in unbelief…

Christmas time is when we remember that Jesus was sent to us as a gift; He arrived on this earth in response to the prophecies of the Old Testament – and we sing carols that rehearse, “Emmanuel, God with us”  and how He came so long ago. We say, “Even so come, Lord Jesus”

Really, in my heart I say it like my boy, begging like I’m afraid He’s forgotten me altogether : Like this whole world is lurching forward into the gloom and darkness and my Heavenly Father is breaking his promise, completely forgetting all about us…   “Don’t forget me!  Don’t forget me!  Please!”

But, as I let my cheek rest against my boy’s and snuggle him as close as I could, the truth of my Heavenly Father’s love warmed my heart and slowed us both to a calm.  What can be done but learn from my own son’s mistaken thoughts and recall God’s love?  He has not forgotten me or left me alone. His plan is sure, I just don’t quite understand it sometimes, the same way that Isaac is too immature to fully understand my love for him.

Deuteronomy 7 gives a wonderful and steadfast promise:

⁹ Know therefore that the Lord your God is God, the faithful God who keeps covenant and steadfast love with those who love him and keep his commandments, to a thousand generations.

Well, true to my word, we got up early at 4:30 the next morning.  I woke Isaac and Emily and Mackenzie – and we loaded up the van and headed north.  You know, as a parent I am totally fallible and able to break my promises to my children.  But God’s love is unfathomable, immeasurable, completely trustworthy – and He can’t lie or break His Word.  He is with me even now, by the unbroken promise of the Holy Spirit’s presence.  I only need to live by faith in His love for me.

This is the truth that keeps me secure : The sureness of His love is my stay. I have not been left alone.