It was an unusual day, Friday was. Four AM was my wake up call. That’s right. 4 AM. The Heavenly Father Himself was on the line and He had a few things to say to me. Boy, did He have my attention.
I went to bed on Thursday night, like any other night. All of my loved ones nestled in their beds, Michael and I cozy. Early the next morning, Mackenzie woke up and needed me, so I went in to her bedroom. A few minutes later I heard a commotion and I found my husband, in the next room, passed out.
fast forward.
By Friday afternoon, I was sitting in the Emergency Room of Memorial Hospital, my hands shaking with an uncontrollable tremor, my head fuzzy without a clear thought on the horizon. Michael had been taken for a CT scan of his head and a chest x-ray. There I sat, in an uncomfortable chair, waiting for him to be returned to me. The only thoughts I could manage were things like, how will I pay the bills if my husband is terminally ill? and, how can I possibly do this life alone?
My heart’s phone rang. “Hello?” I said, in a barely audible voice. “Is that You?” I asked.
And He said, “Yes, my child. Are You ready to come to me now?”
“Oh Heavenly Father, You know I am Yours. We started this journey together a long time ago.”
“That is very true,” he answered, “But, You’ve ventured out alone today. Is that really how you want to travel? by yourself?”
I can’t lie to you. A few hot tears slipped down my cheeks here, because it was true. Many times, I hear His voice, right away and follow. Others, I forget to listen, and forge ahead – assuming I’m going this on my own.
“My dear daughter, I sent my son to die, so that You would be saved from certain death. But, also so that You would have salvation, moment to moment in this life. Regardless of what happens here today, you will not, under any circumstances do life alone.” And He said the following words, so that they were permanently pressed into my heart. I won’t forget them… (at least not for a really long time):
Come to Me, all you who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest.
And I did. I moved towards Him. I stepped closer and He held me in His arms right there, in the Emergency Room and we waited together. The tremors stopped, my mind found a bit of peace and my heart was at rest. Over the last few days I’ve realized that I can not get close enough. I never will, not until Eternity. But for now, I just need to keep stepping in, one step more. and keep listening, when He calls.
I’m blessed beyond measure to tell you that after a lot of tests, we know that Michael is okay. For that, I am very thankful. I am amazed at how my Heavenly Father loves, and continually draws me to Himself, again and again.
Thank you Heavenly Father for such a wondrous love.
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