We sat there in her room this morning at an im-pass. One of us was going to cave, I could feel it coming. But, I couldn’t wait any longer or we would be late. And so, against my better judgement I let my two year old pick out what shoes she would wear.
And what did she choose to wear on her feet to the aquarium this fine hot summer day? Her paten leather cordovan mary janes. Yep – her winter “Sunday” shoes. I did not feel they were the best selection to accompany her cute little aqua and pink knit-sportswear outfit from Old Navy. Typically I let her wear what she wants at home, or to grandmama’s house. But when we’re going out in public, I am the one who makes the wardrobe decisions. However, I’m finding it harder and harder to hold the line. She is two, but seems to think she is the ultimate fashionista. I cringe at a lot of her choices.
After all, it is important how she looks, isn’t it? I mean it is a reflection of me as a mother. Or at least that is how it feels some times. If I don’t dress my children well, if their appearance is out of sorts doesn’t that mean I’m that kind of mama? And then what will people think?
I’ve thought about it a lot today and I’ve come to realize something again, for the one millionth time – but it bears repeating. I need the benefit of letting it sink in one more time. Here it is : I care too much about what people think and too little about what my Heavenly Father thinks.
As his daughter, when it comes to my household’s fashion sense, or the status of my physical appearance, I don’t think He’s too worried. Others may be worried – it may affect my earthly reputation with some peers here on this earth – but He is not concerned. Certainly His care for me does not depend on what I pulled out of the closet today.
I know this is true because He loved me first. He pursued me – and with His love persuaded me to love Him – in spite of my imperfections. I was far from “qualified” to be His child, on so many levels, not just because of my appearance. But, these words in Scripture from 1John 4: 18-19 remind me of the truth.
There is no fear in love; but perfect love casts out fear, because fear involves torment. But he who fears has not been made perfect in love. We love Him, because He first loved us.
Does it mean I don’t continue to bear His fruit, or walk in His ways, or receive the work He is doing in my life? No. It just means I am free of the fear. Fear of man. Fear that He will not love me if… Even more, it means I am at liberty to be the woman He has made me, and the Mama my children need me to be. And in this case, it means I can love the shoes my baby girl loves to wear, no matter which ones she picks.
daily portion 