If you had been at the First Baptist Church in Danville, IL on a Sunday night in 1980, you would have seen my family sitting on the front row. My dad, who was the youth and music pastor, my mom who was the church pianist, my sister, Marilyn age 7 and me age 5.
The front row is a complicated place to be when you’re 5. Especially if your dad is a pastor. There are people watching, mostly deacons. Its even harder when the sermon settles in. I tell you its almost an impossible situation.
My sister and I were extremely vibrant and active children. Sitting still was not easy. And so as the scenario unfolded each Sunday evening, typically we would wind up with “the tap.” You may not have experienced this as a child, so let me describe it to you. As the preaching progressed, my sister and I would begin to struggle with the expected decorum. As wiggles and giggles ensued, my dad could reach his arm as long as necessary and tap us on the shoulder. It was almost as if he had some kind of super power. His was a “stretchy arm” that was capable of reaching great lengths to correct inappropriate behavior. And the finger he used for tapping the shoulder was as weighty as lead. At any other time his index finger was completely normal. But at the right time, he could make it seem heavier than a brick.
It was the dreaded tap. If that didn’t bring about a change in my actions, nothing would. (At least nothing that could be done during church anyway…)
Recently, I’ve been reminded of “the tap.” I made a commitment to be healthy and loose weight. Its a lifestyle change that I need to make for myself and for my family. But I should tell you – its not been easy. So, I made it a matter of prayer. I asked the Holy Spirit to help me and He has.
When confronted with difficult choices, there is a tap on my shoulder. “Should I eat that oreo?” And I feel it. Its gentle, but firm. “Melody, you do not need that…” And most often – I don’t. Its so amazing to me because I didn’t think He wanted to be involved in what I was eating.
If you had asked me – I would have said that He cares about every area of my life. Certainly that’s what I learned even at an early age in Sunday School. I even know a lot of verses to confirm the principle. I’m not sure I believe it, though. I certainly don’t eat like it.
As I move through my life on a day to day basis and I am open to the Holy Spirit, I find that maybe He has been tapping me on the shoulder all along. Was I numb and deaf to his encouragement and correction? Its very possible. But the more I am open to Him, His desires and His leading, the easier I find it to move past those difficult, every day decisions and make the right choices. It could be about food, about exercise, about my children, about my response to any given situation – sincerely, it could be about anything and I find Him interested.
I am so thankful for His love and care for me. I know for sure that I could not make it through my life without Him. I pray that I will not be numb, but rather be alert to His presence in my life.
This makes me think of a lesser known verse to a hymn:
Whenever I am tempted, whenever clouds arise,
When songs give place to sighing, when hope within me dies,
I draw the closer to Him, from care He sets me free;
His eye is on the sparrow, and I know He watches me;
His eye is on the sparrow, and I know He watches me.
As I set out to live a life that is pleasing to Him, I can move with confidence knowing that He is with me and that He is interested. And I can be sure that if I get off track, He will tap me on the shoulder.
md
(originally written January 19, 2010)
daily portion 