(originally written May 2010)
Recently my young family visited the local Panera on a Saturday evening. My husband and I with our three children were hungry after a long day, and it just sounded good. Now, there is a lot that goes on when you take three children to any eating establishment, and this particular evening was no exception.
Between return trips to the restroom and the drink fountain, I learned something. We sat at the table, myself and my daughter on one side of the table, my husband and my son on the opposite side, with Mackenzie in a high chair at the head of the table.
There is nothing as complicated as feeding a one year old at a restaurant while they are discovering the joys of table food, especially if there are only two bottom middle teeth involved in the discovery process. As I tried to feed Mackenzie her very healthy chicken and vegetables, she fed herself little bits and pieces of things that all of us would give her from our plates. A bit of cheese, a crumb of a bagel, some of the apple from my salad, a sip from my husband’s straw and she was absolutely beside herself.
She was so excited, and so interested in those little tidbits, she would not look at me. Her mouth would open and she would eat the food from the spoon, but she was constantly looking elsewhere for something to please her. At one point, (still unwilling to turn her head towards me and the healthy stuff) when my husband got up to get a refill of his drink she cried out, “na na, dada, na na, dada!” because she didn’t want the sweet tea to leave her reach.
As I heard her cry, I realized just how much my daughter and I have in common. Truthfully, I worship, I read Scripture, I pray and meditate on His word. These are the healthy things that fulfill the deep needs of my heart – that will give me strength for life. Still, in my humanity, I’m always looking in my periphery for other things to satisfy. And when I see worldly things fading, that used to give me pleasure, I am devastated. I try to hold them in my clutches, but in the end they always slip away, leaving emptiness.
Time and again I’m reminded that the only satisfaction on this earth comes from our Heavenly Father because of His love and sacrifice for us. Anything else bringing momentary happiness is a mirage. Vanity. Unworthy of our attention. It seems this is a lesson I will keep learning over and over.
There’s an old hymn my dad used to sing, and it rolls through my mind regularly, when I start looking for earthly trappings to meet the needs that only our Heavenly Father can.
Satisfied
All my life I had a longing
For a drink from some clear spring,
That I hoped would quench the burning
Of the thirst I felt within.
Hallelujah! I have found Him
Whom my soul so long has craved!
Jesus satisfies my longings,
Through His blood I now am saved.
Feeding on the husks around me,
Till my strength was almost gone,
Longed my soul for something better,
Only still to hunger on.
Poor I was, and sought for riches,
Something that would satisfy,
But the dust I gathered round me
Only mocked my soul’s sad cry.
Well of water, ever springing,
Bread of life so rich and free,
Untold wealth that never faileth,
My Redeemer is to me.
Ps 63:4-5
“I will praise you as long as I live, and in your name I will lift up my hands. My soul will be satisfied as with the richest of foods; with singing lips my mouth will praise you. ”
Thank you heavenly Father for being all that I need. And thank you for my little Mackenzie, who helped me remember this once again.
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