Miscommunication

(originally written May, 2010)

I have enjoyed the last few weeks’ conversations with my son Isaac. He has a unique understanding of grammar right now. While he does not always manage to say what he means, our chats have become very intriguing.

He has an interesting way of using some kinds of words. Recently we were in a public restroom that had a rather unpleasant aroma. Isaac promptly said to me, “Mommy this baffwoom feels stinky!”

He has not been able to master his use of him vs. her. They are completely interchangeable, no matter who the subject is. Often he refers to my daughter Mackenzie in terms of him and he. “Mommy, him is crying!” And he cannot seem to grasp before and after. He uses after in place of before – “Mommy, will we eat breakfast after we play at the park?” But he really means to ask if we will go to the park after we eat breakfast. Usually I can figure out what he means, but it can be tricky.

At bedtime he likes to give me a list of reminders to tell him the following morning. “Mommy, be sure to tell me to play the bunnies on Super Mario Galaxy in the morning! And make sure you tell me to go to the potty and… and… and…” Sometimes he tells me a whole string of information and honestly I have no earthly idea what he is talking about.

There is one thing I can count on, no matter how much he insists on things that don’t make sense. Even if we are having one of those conversations that are a bit confusing, I know it will end one way: “Mommy, I wuv you!” His little voice is precious; it is music to my ears. Isaac is such a little lover, and I wouldn’t trade even one of these minutes with him for anything.

During these recent moments, I have come to wonder if my prayers sound similar in God’s ears. I know there are times that I pray for things that don’t make sense. Or I ask for things that probably don’t seem to be logical. Based on His ultimate knowledge, does God figure out what I really am hoping for, even if I’m not making the right request? My prayers are made without full understanding. How could I possibly pray any differently? I see dimly. But He sees all and knows all.

There is one thing that I am confident of – He asked for us to come to Him as children, in our innocence. My conversations with my son are so special, even though he isn’t communicating “properly.” And, I believe that it is necessary for us to have similar conversations with God. He wants us to bring our thoughts, our cares, our desires to Him – even if sometimes they don’t make sense. Even if we can’t figure out how to say it right.

It seems to me that really, He is looking for our affection. The same way that I look forward to the ending with Isaac, He longs for our love. If He knows the heart, maybe its not miscommunication, but rather innocence infused with honesty. I hope that someday my prayer time with Him will be more childlike, not so worried about conversing correctly, but instead in an open and free way like the conversations with my son.

Thank you Lord, for inviting me to come to you as I am. Its good to know that you want to hear my voice and that you love me in spite of any miscommunication.

Psalm 145:17-19

17 The LORD is righteous in all his ways
and faithful in all he does.
¹⁸ The LORD is near to all who call on him,
to all who call on him in truth.
¹⁹ He fulfills the desires of those who fear him;
he hears their cry and saves them.